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Treva Brandon Scharf - Writer, Dating Expert

Treva Brandon Scharf is a Los Angeles based blogger, fitness professional, and dating expert. She exercises both sides of her brain as a creative thinker and personal trainer, helping people get fit and find love.

After getting married for the first time at the age of 51, Treva started a whole new chapter of her life which she documents at The Late Blooming Bride, a blog that imparts wit and wisdom about single life and late blooming love.

She also shares her insights about midlife love with the over-50 crowd at The Huffington Post. And at the L.A.Progressive, Treva can be found dispensing health and wellness advice for political junkies and fitness nuts alike.

When she’s not creating content, consulting for companies, or ghost writing dating profiles for her friends, Treva is either training clients, doing speaking engagements, or volunteering as a Special Olympics coach. Treva is passionate about politics, policy, and people of all ages and abilities.

Treva’s fitness philosophy and style of storytelling are personal and powerful, inspirational and aspirational. Whatever the cause or project, Treva always works for the highest good.

  1. Welcome to Older Dating › 
  2. Treva Brandon Scharf

Interview: Expert Thoughts on Over 40s Dating

What are the differences between under 40s online dating and over 40s online dating?

Over 40 online dating is much more jaded and cynical. Chances are, if you're over 40, you're either divorced, separated, or still single, and maybe not to happy about it. Under 40 daters are much more optimistic and willing to give love a chance.

How long do you think it typically takes singles over 40 to find a relationship using online dating, and why?

How fast you find love online depends on how quickly you want to find love. Someone who's motivated, can move very fast; someone who's desperate can move even faster. I'd say anywhere from one week to one month for a first meeting, six months to see if it's real.

Do you think there are different success rates for men and women over 40s when online dating? If yes, why?

Men and women want the same things: love, companionship, intimacy. But women are much more emotional about it. They bond deeper and connect faster than men. Men are more successful dating online only because they're able to detach and move on to the next one.

What's your no.1 tip for singles over 40 starting online dating?

Keep your expectations in check, and keep your sense of humor!

What is the number one mistake people over 40 make when online dating, and why?

The number one mistake people over 40 make when online dating is LIE. Never lie about your age, weight, height, income, etc., it will come back to bite you in the ass.

What's THE best question for singles over 40 to ask someone when messaging them for the first time online?

The best question to ask someone over 40 when messaging them for the first time? "Tell me something about you that's not on your dating profile."

What is your most favourite over 40 online dating success story?

Facebook is the most underrated online dating site in the world because there's no pressure or expectations. I met someone through mutual friends on Facebook. We started off platonic, and ended up getting married a year and a half later. I wasn't looking, I didn't care, and that's when the magic happened.

Dating Tips by Treva Brandon Scharf:

Listen to your body- it will tell you if you're healed, or if you still need to do more work. Because dating is all about facing your fears and getting outside your comfort zones, it's important that you power through, but it's equally important that you respect your body's needs and honor its highest good.